Secret Santa

How a name draw works, the rules worth agreeing first, and what to do when couples and exclusions get in the way.

• Secret Santa questions that actually help you buy better gifts

  Most gift questionnaires produce answers nobody can use. These are the questions that produce a specific, buyable gift — and the ones to stop asking.

• How Secret Santa works

  The whole idea in plain terms: who draws, what a spending limit is for, how to handle a group that is not all in one room, and the rules worth agreeing before you start.

• How to Draw Names for Christmas

  The hat works until it does not. What goes wrong, and the four rules a hat cannot follow.

• Drawing names when couples and exclusions are involved

  Couples who should not draw each other, siblings who share a room, a parent who cannot buy for their own child. How to set the rules — and why too many rules makes a draw impossible.

• Secret Santa gift ideas when you barely know the person

  You drew a name and you know three facts about them. That is more than enough, if you spend it in the right place.

• Secret Santa rules that work for a large family

  A draw among six friends is easy. A draw across four households, three generations and a dozen children is a different problem — and it needs a few more rules.